So here we are once more. Rolling dice as we have a small band of semi-insane figures rampage throughout a setting, usually resulting in explosions and mass deaths. After we were done with Seattle, wrecking large chunks of it on our way out, our group opted to return to Dark Heresy once more. After all, the ending to our last campaign had ended with us fighting a giant d
Rather than just copying across our Shadowrun characters, though bringing Fraggins through was seriously considered, we opted for a fresh start with a duo somewhat unlike before.
Serving as our muscle this time was Jarr Bardason. Allegedly an aging native of Fenris who had ended up in the Imperial Guard somehow. Armed with bow, longlas, a silenced autogun and a couple of mono weapons, he was to serve as the groups muscle. Unfortunately for us, despite a staggering number of common knowledge skills and strength of 40, he was not the most accurate of individuals. His equivalent of sharpshooting appeared to be "Hold down the trigger until you see blood."
Next up we had Ishmael Guilliman. Yes, really. Ishmael's generation was more amusing than it was anything else, as rolling the name Guilliman ended up being hilariously appropriate. Following rolling dyed skin and opting for blue, the character's white hair managed to turn him into the closest we could get to being an actual Smurf. He also ended up with the name Ishmael after his player rolled "Grendel" so many times he was barred from using the Archaic list of names. Apparently he didn't want to have to deal with a PC potentially using God-Mode.
Anyway, Ishmael was to be our groups psyker as he'd stroll around killing people with his force staff and mind bullets. Also floating psyblades as he was a member of the Templar Calix. We kept joking Jarr was probably only recruited to shoot him in the head if he accidentally summoned a bloodletter.
You can guess how well things would end up with these guys working for an Inquisitor.
Opting to start with a prequel, explaining how we met the Inquisitor in the first place, we were involved in fighting on the world of 47 Kapella. With a number of local secessionists having up-risen in a massed force, the Imperial Guard has been called in to put down any resistance and restore order. Having been on the world for sometime, Bardason was eventually called into the camp of his regiment's Imperial Commodore: Smoker.
Promptly saluting the Commissar outside, just avoiding a bullet to the head by leaving his weapons at the edge of the tent, he marched in and saluted again. That seemed to be his approach to a lot of things: Don't ask questions and just salute a lot.
Inside was the Commander himself and an unknown figure in an extremely official looking uniform, his voice disguised by a device which sat over his mouth. Either a re-breather or vocal scrambler of some kind, it was hard to tell. Introduced as Lord Commander Van Graff, he informed the guardsman that he had need of his services. A recent push on another front had temporarily drawn troops from an instillation they needed to investigate for some unknown reason. Bardason had been recruited for the job as a large force would draw too much attention.
As Smoker left, as did the Commissar outside, Van Graff promptly sat down and helped himself to whisky. No, I don't know how he got it past the mask either. After a few seconds, we were joined by a figure completely clothed in light grey material who bowed before the Lord Commander. Guilliman had arrived.
Informing the two that they would be leaving at 01500 (AKA twenty minutes) they were permitted time to prepare for the upcoming mission and dismissed. Talking a bit less formally outside, Bardason gathered his gear just as Guilliman grabbed his stafff from outside. This was the first real confirmation the man was a psyker prompting an "Oh, that explains a bit" from the guardsman. After a short amount of "preperation" AKA grabbing two bottles of moonshine from a figure of questionable standing in exchange for a Commissar's cigar case, they headed off.
Unfortunately for us the first major roll of the game was a horrendous botch.
Rolling 77 to drive the Rhino (his AG was 44) Bardason proceeded to careen across the land like an unholy cross between Frank Drebin and Elwood Blues. After about an hour of driving, trying to follow a non-existent road, the Rhino ended up ditched right outside of a group of rebels waiting in ambush for Imperials. As Bardason tried to reverse the Rhino back out the ditch, it promptly got one of its tracks shot off bu an RPG and had bullets start hammering against the hull.
Giving the order "Deal with this" from the Lord Commander the two broke into action. Dropping the rear access ramp, Guilliman stormed out the back as (dodging a couple of bullets) Badason manned the pintle mounted bolter.
As Bardason began using the gun for suppressing fire, Guilliman cast precognative dodge. Casually walking around the few bullets which were sent his way. Briefly turning his attention to specific targets, blowing off the ear of one cultist and splattering another nearby one with gore.
Nearing the rebels' hiding place, a rock formation just to be clear, Guilliman drew the full attention of a duo of rebels while a third leaped out of cover to bash him over the head with a rifle. The former two fail, one so bad he managed to jam his gun, with the one entering melee fairing far better. Smacking Guilliman over the head he caused 2 damage, making him stagger back slightly. Unfortunately the one with the working gun fired again, promptly killing the man seconds after his initial success.
Deciding he'd had enough, Bardason opened fire on everything which wasn't on his side with the storm bolter eventually succeeding making five hits and using one fate point. All of the enemy fail to dodge the incoming storm of bolt rounds and things go horribly wrong. The previously wounded guy is promptly "blown to bloody goblets by the attack" as his ammo explodes, wounding the person next to him. Another fell, VERY, VERY dead with HIS ammo exploding as well and showing the nearby area with flesh and blood. This causes one of the two remaining guys to fail a willpower test and curl up in a gibbering mess. Getting Righteous Fury off, there was nothing left of the last buy besides a smoking pair of boots. Guilliman promptly mercy killed the survivor.
As he was walking back it was at this point Bardason saw Guilliman's forehead symbol for the first time, barely managing to stop himself laughing. In revenge for the characters skin being blue, the GM (who asks to be referred to as Von Diego from now on) made him unable to see his own reflection, and gave him something obscene as his mark distinguishing him as a psyker.
Returning victoriously to the immobilised Rhino, we found the Lord Commander asleep, waiting for us to finish.
With the first session over we were victorious in our initial skirmish. But stuck with a non-operational tank in the middle of nowhere and behind enemy lines.
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